RRRRRRIIPPPPP! That’s the sound of me tearing what’s left of my hair off of my head. Has Rivera lost the point of this simple storyline? Let me help you out, Jules. Here is a recap:

The Whether Men is a group of conspiratorial nutjobs who think manatees can control hurricanes, so they threatened to steal Max the Manatee for their own nefarious purpose. Rita and Skeeter hired Mark as their Protection Detail while they transport Max back to his watery home. They were first ambushed at a gas station by two conspirators dressed in bear costumes. Mark forced them to flee. Mark and his companions then drove to their destination and began unloading Max, whereupon the same two bear-bozos showed up again, demanding Mark hand over Max! Not Rita! Got it, Rivera?

So, what’s this revelation (panel 2) from NutJob #1 all about? Why would anybody kidnap someone because of a disagreement over their online posts? Clearly, Rita is not the only person posting scientific climate change information. Does Cricket Bro intend to kidnap everyone who disagrees with him? Sure, Cricket Bro is a duplicitous, self-serving conman, but there’s nothing in his character we have seen to suggest he would engage in felonious kidnapping. But I live to learn.

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Breaking News: There are unconfirmed reports that Max the Manatee was attacked and eaten by a 16 foot Burmese Python while lying unattended alongside a local shoreline. Max had been under the care of Storm Brain, a local science-based nonprofit organization. Security consultant Mark Trail could not be reached for comment. State and federal officials will investigate the situation.