Again, who talks like this?

Does this mean that Cherry is going to go on every trip that Mark takes?  Well, that’s not fair to Rusty or Doc, now is it?

OK , didn’t I say enough is enough?!  A solid week of nature followed by a solid week of honey-ka-fuddling and bad, syrupy dialogue… can we just get on with a new story, please?  I know in the old days Mark wouldn’t even be home for a day or two, or even make time for a pickle tickle, and he’d be gone again, with Cherry and Rusty’s sad eyes in his rear view mirror.  I kind of miss that…

As Big-eyes Cherry and Chisel-chin Mark take turns looking out the window and offering up bromides,

we see the Nature preserve that is Lost Forest at its finest!

Even the Apex Predator class is getting in on the act, ready to take down a helpless little deer… and because I spent part of the week in Jury duty (well mostly on call for jury duty…) this reminds me of a scene from My Cousin Vinny… the one with Vinny getting ready to go deer hunting with the Prosecutor…

But seriously… who talks like this?!  I guess Mark and Cherry do…

Really, Mark, don’t you think these shallow compliments and offers of empty praise haven’t worn a bit thin over the years?  I think it would be sporting of you and Rusty to hop up  and offer to do the dishes… but I won’t hold my breath.

Let’s see how much longer it will take before this idyllic scene is shattered by the sound of Mark’s phone going off… sending him away on another assignment!  We can only hope for such things.   We can only hope that there are interesting characters and an actual plot line that will resolve in 60-90 days…  but, again, I won’t hold my breath…

Flapjacks it is!  But Pancakes Flambe?

Chery’s looking a sleepy eyed… but boy oh boy… is there anything sexier that Cherry Davis Trail with a big plate of perfectly cooked pancakes??

And what the Hell is up with Rusty?  Good lord, he’s looking damaged today… more and more like that Banjo Savant from the movie Deliverance… Oh be kind, though… he doesn’t get out much, and his alcoholic father probably beat him regularly…

And Still…

…more nature…

…some of it out definitely out of range and habitat… but at least we are finally greeted (after a week) with the stirring of human voices…

And who do you suppose is cooking breakfast?  Cherry of course, lest we disturb time honored and tested roles… Not to say that men don’t cook, but that’s not the way in the Trailverse.  But poor little baby mouse, running after momma in panel two of today’s strip… he’ll never see her again…

And what’s with all the reference to “still, stagnant, and static air?”  Hmmm I wonder… guessing that Mr. Allen got out his thesaurus and was also reminded that alliteration is an effective device…  Or is this a setup for crushing Rusty’s ideas- “Hey, Mark, want to go sailing?”  “Sorry Rusty, the air is still, stagnant and static today… guess we’ll have to pass on that idea…”

Just waiting…

…for something…

…to happen.

Although I wasn’t aware that Beavers were eligible for glass prosthetic eyes… Lost Forest must have quite the benefits package… either that or Doc has been experimenting somewhere between “catch” and “release…”

Poor Mark!!  Imagine people on the internet being snide and sarcastic!  That never happens!

And we are certainly getting our fill of Nature this week!  B-roll of all manner of Fauna and Fowl… hmmm… makes me wonder what’s for dinner…

It takes six months to burn through an afternoon in Hawaii, but in the space of three days, Mark has written his article, Bill has edited the article, put it in the very next issue of Woods and Wildlife Magazine, the issue went to the printers, hit the newsstands and mailboxes of faithful readers who apparently took the time to write the magazine and tell them how much they loved it!  My head is spinning.

But how sad Mark looks at the prospect of being an on-line phenom…  Cherry is stricken… as if the Internet is full of trolls (ok, it is…) but that they would all sharpen their forks and knives for Mark!  Poor Mark, he’s only known approbation in his sheltered life, he only hears how great he is!  Now his flanks are exposed to the global zeitgeist!  How will humanity respond?  With a yawn, I’d reckon… I mean, really?  What it takes to have a breakthrough, to go even moderately viral, is staggering… or just being lucky, or filling the frame with kittens and puppies…  but who knows, maybe Mark will be a hit there, too…

Seriously.  I just noticed the resemblance… Sure, you all know who I am talking about, right?  Eugene Levy, Actor, Writer, Producer, recently of the comedy serial “Up Schitt’s Creek?” Perhaps most famous for his early days on SCTV, the “American Pie” franchise, and the guy with (literally) two left feet in “Best in Show.”  Anyway… eyebrows.  Even Doc’s are prominent and jet-black…

So it’s come to this, campers… 50 words on eyebrows.  That’s all I got…

Doc, having now been subjected to rounds and rounds of aimless prattling by Mark about the Red Imported Fire Ant Story that got away, must surely be thinking “When is this going to end?  it was so quiet around here… and now he’s back…” And Mark, you need to give up on the notion that the island “exploded…”  It’s not quite accurate…

And Poor Cherry, standing there wondering how they are going to pay off the credit card bill from their Hawaiian vacation, is anxious for Mark to turn in the story on “Surviving the Eruption” so he can get paid…  Mark must be one hell of a fast writer to expect that he’s already pounded that one out…

… like the back-end of the always-enthusiastic large breed canine…  Andy the St. Bernard… But of course, Doc is taking the words right out of our mouths… as we too were wondering how Mark and Abbey escaped that certain doom, unlike any other mere mortals caught in the midst of a major eruption… Not to mention jumping 100 feet into the ocean…

But here we are back at the dining room table at Lost Forest… a comforting and familiar scene, cups of black coffee, the Bunn Commercial coffee maker off camera, with water always kept at brewing temperature, since they drink this stuff by the pot-full…

The last panel shows Cherry poking her head in from the kitchen, where she is cleaning up after the meal, while the men sit on their usesless arses and discuss weighty matters… Yes, Campers, time stands still at Lost Forest…

Hawaii it is, then… but let’s get something straight here…  Shouldn’t Mark be ‘Darling,’ and Cherry ‘Honey?’  And Mark, you might smile when you announce that you are taking Cherry to Hawaii… Cherry will have to get time off from the Big Lots store, or wherever she spends her days and nights while Mark is away…

Really, I think the kiss would have said it all.  Unfortunately Cherry is ruining what might be a perfectly wonderful kiss by talking her way through it, but hey, to each their own!

News for you, Mark- one rarely announces one’s intentions related to relationship investment, one simply does…

And again, Mark, what work??  Mark’s idea of “work” still sits wide of the common understanding that most of us carry around with us…  Not suggesting that there aren’t many ways to earn a paycheck, it’s just that the measure of his output (writing) seems rather sparse.  I can’t remember the last article he produced.  His editor stopped calling him once he realized that every assignment would end with mountains of paperwork and  insurance claims… usually tied to exploding boats…

Dollars to donuts, though, they are heading to Hawaii to find the remains of Honey and Darling, who apparently were also “investing in their relationship…”  which will lead to all kinds of adventure, no doubt.  And what of Rusty and Andy?  Oh, not to worry, “Doc” will be there, as always, to pick up where Mark falls down as a parent… or at least let’s hope that Mark’s idea of investing in his relationship with Cherry doesn’t include bringing his adopted son along…  “Hey Mark, want to go fishing?”  Ugh…