Remember Ranger Dusty?  Cherry’s call for help when Mark didn’t come home that night??

Apparently, Dusty is no friend of Doc’s anymore!  Not after being accused of insanity or other improprieties…

That’s right!! Doc is a Tee-damn-totaler!  Coffee, black is the strongest thing he ever puts past his gums!!  And as Rusty (rhymes with Dusty) has been lurking just off (below?) camera, he sees his opportunity to pop his head up out of his hole and offer up his giraffe story again…  What?  Is Mark going to have to get out his switch and beat some sense into these people??

Speaking of switches, I noticed that former Viking running back and face-of-the-franchise Adrian Peterson is in a bunch of Financial hot water!  Regular readers know that I am not a fan of this team, and this guy, in particular, has always galled me.  And I predict that he will soon be on the rubbish heap of athletes who have earned 10’s if not 100’s of millions of dollars through playing and endorsements only to find their way to the bankruptcy court…  Why a bank would make a high six-figure loan to a guy using his contract (with no guarantees) as security is beyond me!  And the fact the Peterson’s Eden Prairie, MN home (one of 5 or six he “owns”) already has two mortgages on it comes as no surprise whatsoever… Just like the people featured “My 600 lb Life,” someone has to be abetting this behavior- someone has to be bringing the food into the house!!

OK, we get the joke.  It took an entire (two?) week(s) to tell it!!

But seriously.  What is that perched on the Magnolia branch overlooking Lost Forest?  At first I’d say Eagle or some kind of Raptor, but look at the bill… It’s almost Toucan-like… Is there some kind of Genetic Engineering going on the stables?

Now we find ourselves, ABR (All But Rusty, the natural state,) out on the Porch continuing to listen in on Doc’s conversation…

But isn’t it know in these parts that Doc is a teetotaler?  Pretty sure he never touches the stuff… but then one never knows what goes on behind closed doors… heck, with all that space, they could easily be shining… At least that would explain where they get the money to sustain what appears to be a life of perpetual leisure…

And as Mark and Cherry listen in on Doc’s conversation, we see them decked out in L.L. Bean’s finest… Cherry in the Women’s Premium Double L Polo in Cardinal Red, Mark in the Men’s Signature 1933 Chamois Cloth Shirt, slim fit…  You, too can dress and look like Cherry and Mark, gang, but get yours quick!  They are going like hotcakes!!

Aren’t the Trail/ Davises the law in these parts?  Wouldn’t authorities be calling them if they were the ones to spy these interlopers, especially of the four-legged and winged variety??

So as Doc describes a Seussian scene right out of Mulberry Street to some unnamed authority, we have to ask this question:  How long with this scene be milked in the name of (ahem) sustaining a daily commitment to fill the paper with a storyline that will continue to beguile and intrigue??  That is the hallmark of the Allen regime… No idea is banal enough to not let it play out for weeks into months, all in the name of not having to compose and follow an actual plot line…

And Mark!  What’s all this then?  Lost Forest used to be a sanctuary where you could return from your exploits, tell your tales, lick your wounds and recharge your batteries…  You are being invaded my friend!  And let me remind us all of the way that Mark has suffered at the hands of James Allen from the get-go!  From day one under this sadistic pen, Allen had Mark, with a separated shoulder, treed by a bear and forced to spend the night there!

And thanks, Mark for bringing up that awful memory of the Dinosaur Dream!  That was the day I was supposed to go fishing…  although there wasn’t any actual footage of the same…  Supposedly I caught more fish than you did… That was back in the Elrod days…

But now the shamed and emotionally thrashed Rusty is turning to exhibit ‘A’ … the apples…  as Mark looks on in disbelief.  Even Ol’ Andy is getting in on the caper!

What, you go out to pick some apples for your breakfast and you fall asleep?  I think there’s something seriously wrong, here!  You been digging into Doc’s Medicine Cabinet again??  You know that those pills are for animals, right, Rusty??

And yes, we remembered the Dinosaurs…  At least a week ago…

At least Mark has a smile on his face…

Boy, are Mark and Cherry going to be surprised when Doc comes in and declares that there is an ostrich-riding monkey on the premises…  Crow anyone!?

But seriously… are Rusty’s ears getting bigger?

And why is he being shamed into a confession that he knows is not necessary?  Poor lad…  C’mon, Rusty… Boy-up!  Tell Mark and Cherry where they can stick their doubts!

Howler Monkey?   Maybe…

But clearly a strong F-U from our non-native, invasive friends…

An ill-tempered, flightless bird and a primate with a Napoleon complex… I’d be checking myself, too!

This is great- the familiar juxtaposed with the exotic…  The monkey’s little coat (with shoulder boards) and fez is a winning touch!  Not to mention the well-rendered ostrich…  Doc has to be wondering what’s in his coffee!!

In two days we have been treated to a Hungh!? and now a What Th-!? Does it get any better than this?  And does an Ostrich really make the GROO GROO GROOOOOO sound?  Apparently so…

In other news (The Minneapolis Star Tribune to be exact…)  there is a real-life case making the news that is eerily familiar…

Look at the Burns…  Can you say Dirty Dyer??

This is great!  Rusty needs a witness and looks like Doc is going to get in on the hallucinations…  Lord only knows what is making this GROO GROO sound…

It’s difficult to see what Doc is reading in the Daily Journal, but judging by the column spacing, I’d say he’s scanning the obituaries… Checking to see if he’s in there!!  Ha!

I still have money on the circus train…

As Rusty spills his news, he continues to be greeted with ridicule and scorn…

…and unless he has a history of spewing un-truths, the reaction seems a bit harsh…

So repeat after me…

There are no Giraffes in Lost Forest,

There are NO Giraffes in Lost Forest,

There are NO Giraffes in Lost Forest…

I guess we’ll never know just how intensely Rusty “interrupted” Mark and Cherry, but you can bet that he will think twice about speaking without being spoken to first!  Yikes!

Now that Mark has regained his composure and Cherry has remained off-camera in order to gather herself, we are now on the slow roll that lets Rusty reveal what it is he’s seen!  Only to the inevitable dismissals and denials of Mark, who couldn’t possibly wrap his head around this news…